By Stanley Tinkle
Back in the Antebellum Days—you know, when your Auntie was the Belle of the Ball—young ladies took fancy dance cards to cotillions. If your male ancestor hoped to dance with Scarlett, he asked her in advance to write his name down for at least one dance. You know, “Darling, save the last dance for me!” Obviously, the system worked, because I see you’re here today. So am I, come to think of it. We owe a lot to dance cards.
Hoping to avoid looking like doofuses, a quartet on a gig prepares a little card that lists their best songs, prior to the performance. They often write down the title, the key, and the first few words of each song. This allows their performance to flow uninterrupted from start to finish. It’s a great idea.
Some of us have personal song lists. I know a certain curmudgeonly fellow who has a couple of small cards which list the songs he is willing to consider singing with friends, or with probationary acquaintances, and maybe even with strangers. It saves him a lot of shouting, gesticulating, apoplexy … and time. Time, as we know, is money. Why throw it away?
So a stranger tells him, “Hi. I’m Chumly Chalmers, and I’m a bass. Let’s sing a song.”
Our friend says, “Glad to meet you, Chalmers. I’m Curly Mudge. Here’s my song list. Take your pick.”
Chumly scans it and wisely skips over the tough songs (“The Bear in Tennis Shoes”), the wordy ones (“I’m My Own Grandpa”), the in-your-face ones (“You’re Nobody’s Sweetheart Now”), and the doormat ballads (“Last Night Was the End of the World!”). He settles on two of my own personal favorites (“Sweet and Lovely” and “On Moonlight Bay”), and off they go. Time elapsed: ten seconds.
You may surmise that my friend is a lead singer. That is an understandable presumption,
because obviously a lead can’t “wing it”. If he doesn’t know a given song, he’ll have a lively time trying to woodshed it. But the song list concept applies to everyone, because a personal list helps us all remember those songs we don’t get to sing every day (“Heart of a Clown”, “Oh, Canada!”, “Maggie”, and “She Was Only a Stable boy’s Daughter”). Well, you’d better ignore that last song; it was an attempt at levity. You can replace it with “Run for the Roundhouse, Nellie!” Singers who are new to barbershop will be especially glad to peruse your song list; hoping it contains the one Barber Pole Song they have mastered so far.
Chorus chapters feel a need to replace many of their repertoire songs every year, but many quarteters prefer to revisit their early singing favorites over and over. Because I’ve forgotten many of the song titles I used to love, I’ll share with you the song list that I now show to strangers. It is my comprehensive list of all the songs I can sing as a lead. Now, because my range is Baja Bari plus Wedgie Tenor, the only songs I can perform as lead are either in the key of A flat or in A natural. Here is my unexpurgated song list:
Stan’s Lead Gig Song List (Ahem):
“Heart of my Heart”. A flat. Heart of my heart, I love…etc.
“Happy Birthday to You”. A natural. La la la la la la. (Lyrics protected by copyright; you’re under arrest!)
Elapsed time: thirty seconds. Hey, I wasn’t reading it. You were. But that’s my song list. Please don’t spread it around. I prefer to keep it under my hat, or in my wallet.
Barbershop Survey
by Keith Eckhardt
For a while now I've been wondering about the two questions:
1) What is the dominant singing level of our choruses and
2) How our members feel about the variety of music to arrange in the
barbershop style.
In the survey at http://www.spebsqsafwd.org/html/cksurvey.html I ask these
two questions.
You can see the status of the survey at any time at
http://www.spebsqsafwd.org/html/CKSurveyResults.cfm.
Feel free to join in, but please respond only once.
Keith Eckhardt
Placerville, CA
50 Years of Harmony
Submitted by Dave Gryvnak
In 1998 the Far Western District published the book "50 Years of Harmony" as a paper document. This past week David Melville of the Greater Phoenix
Chapter extracted it from his archives, updated it and provided it online at
http://www.spebsqsafwd.org/historybook/index.html.
(Editor's Note: In Chapter 9 of this history, page 66, this event is listed in 1991: "A new chapter in Orange, California, was being formed with more emphasis on quartets and fun and less on chorus and competition.")
April Showers
researched by Dorothy Acton
Before Al Jolson (1886-1950) made history in the first talking picture "The Jazz Singer" in 1927, he worked in vaudeville and on Broadway. "April Showers" was written for Jolson for the Broadway musical "Bombo" which took the stage in 1921. Songwriter B. G. (Buddy/George) DeSylva (1895-1950) had already been working with lyricist Lew Brown and composer Ray Henderson, producing hits like "The Birth of the Blues" and "Button Up Your Overcoat." But in 1921, DeSylva teamed with composer Louis Silvers (1889-1954) to write "April Showers," one of the many hits for Jolson from that show. The lilting ballad had staying power, recorded by Jolson in 1946 for "The Al Jolson Story," used as a theme for the Kraft Music Hall in 1947, and serving as the centerpiece in 1948 for the film "April Showers" (supposedly based on the life of Buster Keaton) starring Ann Southern and Jack Carson.
APRIL SHOWERS
Life is not a highway strewn with flowers,
Still it holds a goodly share of bliss,
When the sun gives way to April showers,
Here's the point that you should never miss.
Though April showers may come your way,
They bring the flowers that bloom in May.
So if it's raining, have no regrets
Because it isn't raining rain you know,
It's raining violets.
And when you see clouds upon the hills,
You soon will see crowds of daffodils.
So keep on looking for a bluebird,
And listening for his song.
Whenever April Showers come along.
Taxes: Paid With Pleasure
found on the Internet
Dear Internal Revenue Service,
Enclosed you will find my 2005 tax return showing that I owe you $3,407.00 in taxes. Please note the attached article from USA Today newspaper dated 12 November, wherein you will see that the Pentagon (Department of Defense) is paying $171.50 per hammer and NASA has paid $600.00 per toilet seat.
I am enclosing four (4) toilet seats valued at $2,400.00 and six (6) hammers valued at $1,029.00 which I secured at Home Depot, bringing my total remittance to $3,429.00. Please apply the overpayment of $22.00 to the "Presidential Election Fund" as noted on my return. You can do this inexpensively by sending them one (1) 1.5 in. Phillips Head Screw (see an aforementioned article from USA Today newspaper detailing how HUD pays $22 for each 1.5 in. Phillips Head Screw). One screw is enclosed for your convenience.
It has been a pleasure to pay my tax bill this year, and I look forward to paying it again next year.
Sincerely,
A Satisfied Taxpayer
Next Issue
Target publication date for the next Squeezins' bulletin is May 1-15 or whenever we get enough articles. Send your articles to Editor at dcacton@earthlink.net.
ORANGE SQUEEZIN'S
